Potholes, raindrops, and vacation?

Potholes, raindrops, and vacation?

 

By Jerry Wadian

wadian@thefayettecountyunion.com

 

 

Another year, another “vacation,” and more proof that potholes and raindrops don’t mix.

My wife, Becky, and I were going back to visit my brother and mom in Massillon, Ohio. As an added bonus, our son Taylor is spending the summer in Cincinnati, so we decided to extend the vacation a few days, rent a car, and   go to both cities.

Fortunately, we left on a Thursday; the Wednesday before the Eastern Iowa Airport was shut down due to a bomb threat!

That’s just what you need as you approach the TSA security area; where it is easier to get a bomb onboard the plane than my wife’s nail file!

For once, there were no problems with anybody in security, and the flight was perfect. Delta (Doesn’t Even Leave The Airport) was polite, on time, and very user-friendly – it should have been an omen.

In just two hours (flying time, over four total) we were at the Akron-Canton Airport, where we had a Hyundai Accent economy car waiting for us.

Then the fun began.

We were wandering the huge parking lot filled with cars from five different rental companies when I felt a few raindrops.

Foolishly, I looked up. The clouds were darker than my Honda, which is colored a black pearl! I mean black looked pale compared to what I was looking at! Later, we learned that an F1 tornado hit just a few miles the other side of the airport; all we got was the roll cloud.

Well, the need to find the car sort of intensified a bit, and by the time the raindrops turned to wind-driven, horizontal sheets of drops, the need was more of an imperative.

Lucky for us, there was an attendant who was able to find the car, which was cleverly hidden at the end of a row behind a pickup truck.

By the time we get into the car, Becky and I were soaked. As for the poor attendant . . .

Then, we had to trek through the flood-drenched streets with the little Accent – next time I will insist on a car with a snorkel!  

We finally made it to the restaurant where my brother was waiting and had a great Mexican meal, complete with pineapple (don’t ask, I don’t understand, either).

 The next day we went to the Amish country and enjoyed another fine meal. And when they bake long johns, the emphasis is on looong!

Another big reason to visit this area was a wonderful little Amish saddle and leather shop with a very nice owner that fully backs his New Balance shoes.

Two weeks before, I had ordered a pair of my favorite shoes from the 1040 series and a pair from the waterproof gore-tex line for events like track and golf meets, football games, and the like.

Guess which pair of shoes came in and what the weather was like for three days? If you said the 1040’s and dry weather, I have a hint for you: Under no conditions enter our football contest because as pathetic as our self-proclaimed Swami is at guessing, he is going to make you look so bad!

 Three days of showers – oh, joy! The one thing that took my mind off my wet feet was dodging and weaving on the city streets.

Seems Massillon recently proclaimed that it had finally fixed all of the potholes from the spring thaw. I hate to break the news to city officials, but they missed a few hundred – or more!

The little Accent bounced all over the place ­– and, I could be wrong, but I thought I saw the roof of one of those Mini-Coopers in one of the holes!

Since Massillon has also announced that it is officially broke, it won’t be filling in any more of its “nonexistent” potholes.

While that may be scary news for motorists and nasty a surprise to tourists, I can imagine that the car-alignment folks are chuckling with glee.

In addition, the longtime mayor who put the town in its current shade of deep red wants to run again. Which slogan will he use, “The guy who led us into bankruptcy can lead us out” or “Let’s spend our way out of debt”?

While I hated to say goodbye to Mom and Dave, getting away from the rain and cavities made the departure less sorrowful.

The 3.5-hour drive to Cincinnati was uneventful although we did drive through Fayette County! All I can say about the one in Ohio is that it has an interstate highway running through it.

Normally, we’d fly out of the Cincy airport, which is mysteriously located in Kentucky, but the prices were outrageous. So, we flew out of Dayton, just over an hour away, for half of what it cost to go to Akron-Canton!

Naturally, there was rain, thunder and lightning the day we left, but once again Delta delivered an effortless flight that was on time.

When we got home, we found a delighted dog that ran in circles of glee to greet us.

The cat, on the other hand, was thoroughly traumatized by our absence, refusing to leave my lap or the tops of y feet. It had also got bitten by something while we were gone. So, off to North Fayette Animal Clinic to not only give it antibiotics, but to also have it surgically removed from my foot – I would say it was glad to see us, especially since he has been especially affectionate the last week – I hope that’s not another omen!

 

 

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